this happened all the way back in december on new years. him and i are getting married soon but these photos are still haunting me.. he explained that they were just dancing for a minute, and he doesnt even know her, just grabber her for a minute on the dance floor. he has aplogized many times but i still feel pretty awful about it. every time he goes out, i get uncool and start attacking him about the past. i wasn't like this before i saw these photos of him, which were a really huge slap in the face that i dont always know whats going and what he does when im not there.. how can i deal with my feelings? honeslty, i feel like getting back somehow, make him feel the same insecurity and disturb his peace. but our relationship is not about games, i dont want to really do that to him. but i need to somehow find a way to get this out of my head and move on, because it's starting to damage my relationship. im bitter and argumentative. help!!! what do you think? i actually asked the girl about it! how embarrassing.,.. but i was loosing my mind and my trust had been wrecked:( what do you think?
my boyfriend is in another place, away from me. i couldnt bring in the new
year with him thought i really wanted to and then i see pictures of him
bringing it in with someone else...this was a visual slap in the face that
we are physically miles away from each other and proof that i don't know
everything that goes on when i'm not there. till then i never once doubted
his honesty, but the fact that he didnt mention meeting new people...it was
really hurtful to see those photos and to discover that he might be keeping
things from me sometimes. ever since, every time he goes out, i find myself
questioning him and this has really caused a rift in our relationship. new
years nights is the basis of my judgments, and its just really important
that i know whether or not he was being honest. was he acting like a guy who
had a girlfriend? or was he flirting with you? that caption is really
confusing. maybe you two kept dancing all night and thats why your friend
would write that.. maybe you two became friends.. and this is all ok with
me. its just the fact that he said he didnt even speak to you, and you only
danced for a minute, it just doesnt sound believable..
maybe you think im blowing this out of proportion, or that im a crazy gf..
but im about to make a lifelong commitment to him and i would like to figure
this out. because its making me torment him every time he goes out without
me.. and please dont think that by telling me anything you will harm our
relationship. from whatever you tell me, ill make myself a dipnote and that
will be it. i hope i've made myself clear this time, and im looking forward
to hearing back from you. thanks lindsay
your boyfriend is telling the truth. i was extremely drunk and barely even
remember seeing him on new years eve, i think he was a friend of a friend
and we were dancing near each other. my friends and i took a lot of pictures
that night and when looking through our cameras the next day, we thought it
was funny how he was in some of our photos. my friend posted the pictures,
as a joke, bc we didnt know the guy and we thought it was amusing. bf stands
for ';boyfriend'; - but was a complete joke because he is a total STRANGER to
me and my friend who posted the picture thought it would be funny. simple as
that.
you have nothing to be worried about, absolutely nothing happened. PLEASE
move on with your life with him and keep me out of this mess.
best of luckMy fiance and this girl dancing. What do you think of these photos?
What I see...
I'd take these pictures as just him having a spontaneous moment that was not based on attraction or even flirtation, more of ';in the moment'; and he would've grabbed anyone- an old lady perhaps.
I understand how you feel!!! Really, I do. But- from the pictures it looks as though he was being silly, not flirtatious. Poor judgment on his part is all...he should've grabbed an old lady ;)
Forgive though, and move on. Life is just too short- I know that from personal experience. BUT- if it happens again...some ';spontaneous moment of silliness'; with another woman...than he might be a classic flirt and you'll than need to decide if you can live with it or not. But for now- try to let it go.
Besides...you are very pretty and not to be mean but...well...she's not nearly as pretty!My fiance and this girl dancing. What do you think of these photos?
if he was just dancing with her for a minute and doesnt even know her and doesnt contact her at all.
then what are u worrying about ?
Go out and dance with him all you like ! He is yours !
That girl is probably dancing with every guy in the room ! it looks like she was just joking around.
Stop worrying, he wont do it again considering he knows how strongly u feel about the matter.
goodluck
and it seems some how this girl in the photo has already responded.
If they had hooked up this evening dont you think one of his friends would have told you about it?
I really hate when my gfs get emails from strange woman asking them about something like this, it is a little crazy that you couldn't take your fiances word for it, and trust him.
You need to burry the hatchet on this one if you plan on marrying him.
I can appreciate why your upset, but you need to consider your fiances feelings as well, think of how awful he feels that you still carry this around with you everyday, you both need to move past this, forget about it, and think ahead for the future.
I do think you're over-reacting. It looks like he's just having fun. Can you honestly say that you've never danced with someone you barely know? Cos I know that I've danced with strangers.
It's in the past and he's apologised, she sounds sincere in her explanation and it doesn't sound like he's given you any reason before or after this for you to doubt him so much. You're reading things into the photo without having a reason, it sounds like you're just upset and bitter that you didn't get to spend to New Years with him and you're taking it out on him by using this as an excuse. So stop dragging it up out of the past every time you argue. That is one of the worst things to do.
You really should go for pre-marriage counselling because it sounds like you have major trust issues and if you can't get past that then you're marriage is going to difficult.
Oh please, grow up. Dancing is not a sin and he did nothing wrong.
If you cannot deal with the distance, do HIM a favor and find someone that you can haunt, prosecute, spy and accuse in your own hometown.
Jeez
Haven't you ever been out dancing and people all around you are having a good time and you dance with them also. This is why it's called a ';dance floor'; your out there in the open where everyone goes to dance with everyone else watching. Come on' hunny if you would have noticed in the pics they were dancing around how many other people. You should be way more trusting than that, Is he was this overbearing when you go out with your girlfriends if so you both have trust issue's and this marriage is heading for diaster. If you don't trust him now, you will never trust him. Trust is one of the biggest issues in any relationship so if you can't fathom that your guy is able to have a good time with his friends and other people you need to find someone who will only focus on you all of the time, these kind of guys are out there. My friends and I usually try to stay away from the ones who won't let you out shopping, out with the girls, watching your every move because they know you ';meeting someone'; but some girls are into this and you just might be one of them.. (I would keep ahold of what I had though)
There is nothing wrong with these photos, he was just having fun.. Why would he have to apologize for dancing?? Trust him or Leave him
From what you have said and from the pics you have nothing to worry about. They were just dancing and that is all it is. Stop being so insecure and learn to trust him. Just look forward to your wedding day.
There is nothing wrong with those photos.Lots of people dance with others at clubs.I dont mind my fiance dancing with another girl.I know he wouldn't do anything.
Sounds like you're a little paranoid and you obviously don't trust him for whatever reason. If I got mad at my fiance for every girl he ever talked to or danced with, he would break up with me pretty quick because that's SO ';high school';. Let him have his fun. Don't be controlling telling him he can't have a good time when he goes to the clubs. Those pictures aren't even bad at all - he's barely even touching her! They just look like they're enjoying themselves on New Years Eve.
Take her advice and move on.
I think you are over-reacting. The first photo she looks uncomfortable and his is goofy off. The second one they just look like they are joking around, I mean no one serious does that at a club or wherever you are.
WAIT ...
first of all why do you appear to have posted part of an email to /from someone else?? Are you lindsay and did you email her asking, and the bottom part is her response??
Second, what PHOTOS ?? I only see 1 of him dancing, and one standing next to a girl. Come on now.
Third, the dance looks drunken, out of control, and not intimate at all.
Fourth, you can't and do not have the RIGHT TO know what he's doing all all day every day, and he need not break it all down and list all the people he spoke to. If you don't trust him, either get over your insecurity and jealousness, or dump him if you genuinely think HE is the problem.
There is no magical solution to this. You are completely over-reacting and i'm not sure why. If you don't see him much or live far away (as you ..appear..? to have said?) you need to accept the fact that this is not a proper relationship at all.
Relationships (couples) need the people living in at least the same city.
LASTLY.... This might be taken the wrong way but it shouldn't as it's not bad, just a bit of fun...
I actually think your boyfriend was being MOCKED. This happens often on bebo/myspace etc photos or in groups. If there is a weird or creepy or funny guy (or girl) who randomly speaks (or dances) with people, he will be deemed someone's boyfriend or 'best mate' as a joke. If he didn't dance with her but posed in a photo it might have just said ';jane and some guy'; and if he was in the background probably nothing at all. But since he was INVOLVED in the photo or with the group he was mentioned.
Consider the fact that it does make sense to jokingly call him someone's boyfriend if he danced with her, but they didn't even know his name or get to speak to him. So they couldn't put ';jane and dave'; as they genuinely had nothing to do with eachother. Having his name, imo, would be more suspicious. (but probably still innocent)
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